How Moving Far Away Became the Best Thing I Ever Did

Today marks the one year anniversary of the day I left everything and everyone behind, spread my wings, and moved to paradise. Looking back, it ended up being the best thing I could have ever done for myself. But even still, I'm not gonna act like I wasn't sobbing when I had to say goodbyes to my family, or nervous when I boarded that one way flight. And I admit, it hasn’t all been rainbows and sunshine. I honestly wasn’t ever really scared to make this move, as my intuition reassured me that it was the right decision. But for a while, there were many times I felt alone and isolated. It only took a couple months after moving before people seemed to forget about me, and to this day I don’t really speak to anyone from back home regularly besides my mom. I didn’t realize I would be essentially starting over, living an entirely new life all on my own. But miraculously, it all came together. I eventually made some incredible new friendships, I not only survived but I thrived amongst an entirely new culture that isn’t exactly welcoming to outsiders, I discovered my passion and purpose in life, I unlocked levels of my own consciousness that have blown me away, and I’ve had some unforgettable and life-changing experiences. But above all, I have really become genuinely happy, and undergone a revolutionary awakening.

I am not exaggerating in any way when I say that I am a completely different person from the girl who got off that plane last year. I do not mean this because my life now consists of beach days, aloha spirit, and an endless tan. The obvious perks of living here are phenomenal, but it goes much deeper for me. Hawaii has been the perfect place to find myself. I honestly attribute this to the magical energy here, which natives have always referred to as “mana”. It has been powerful, healing, and really connected me to nature and the universe in a way I never dreamed of. 

I didn’t realized how drastic this shift was until I went back home to Maryland for two weeks. The place where I was born and raised somehow looked and felt so strange. After being gone for eight months, amazingly nothing had really changed there and everyone still seemed to be carrying on exactly as they were before I left. Yet after my transformation, my previous life was almost unrecognizable.  It was great to see my friends and family, but I realized I could no longer relate to anyone from back home. I wondered, had I stayed, would I be in the same old rut too? Complacent with my 9-5 like everyone else, and never demanding more from my life or searching within for answers? East Coast Amanda used to be concerned with extremely trivial things like gossip, going out, drinking, chasing boys, rocking the hottest outfits, buying expensive things, making lots of money.  None of which matter at all to me anymore. These days, the kind of things on Hawaii Amanda’s mind are entrepreneurship, art, organic food and nutrition, sustainability, volunteering, native cultures, social activism, and most of all spirituality. What a difference. I now see the world with totally new eyes.

I always joke around that “moving to Hawaii turned me into a hippie” but in all honesty, it pretty much did. I am so at peace with myself, with my life, and with the world, that I find myself just smiling for no reason. This journey I’m on has been so liberating. It began years ago, but evolved to new heights here. Most of this is due to having to be totally self-reliant and spending so much time alone, which led to exploring and contemplating nature; focusing on my spiritual studies and research; and lots of inner work. This got me to the point where I no longer care about conforming to society’s norms, fitting in, or money and material things. I no longer have a huge ego to feed, which is quite an accomplishment for a prideful leo. A lot of people may judge me for still being single at 28, for going on solo vacations, for having lots of tattoos, for listening to heavy metal, for saying “fuck” a lot, for being into “new age” philosophy, for basically being a walking paradox. But for the first time in my life, I am so completely comfortable with who I am that I accept and love myself unconditionally, and that’s all that matters. It’s complete freedom.

Would any of this have happened if I had stayed in my little comfort zone in Maryland? It’s pretty doubtful. Had I not been thrust into a lot of solitude and reflection, I would not have heard the voice of my own soul and explored myself as I have over the past year. It took being in a new and foreign place 5000 miles away for me to get here. Along the way, I have had a ton of fun and adventures, and pushed myself to be fearless (such as swimming with sharks) and rediscovered my true passions (such as writing and helping others). I have come to appreciate how strong and brave I am, and now embrace my authentic self, instead of who the world convinced me I should be. I could not ask for anything more fulfilling.

I now like to tell people these ironic stories of how when I was a little kid, I saw this tiny little island chain on the map in the middle of the Pacific ocean and said, “who the heck would actually live there?” Or how when I initially got presented with the opportunity to take a job in Hawaii, I immediately wrote it off due to the cost of living. But my life now is proof that remarkable things come when you stop playing it safe and take some risks in life. I know most people are perfectly content to stay settled in their hometown for the rest of their lives, which is fine. But I discovered I am just not one of those people. I know I would have never been happy settling for the status quo. I would be perfectly content being a gypsy and moving around the world for the rest of my life, or maybe staying here. But I honestly don’t know if I could ever return home. The door is now open to unlimited possibilities.

 

“She crossed an ocean to follow her heart, and she found her soul.”

 

XOXO❤️